After getting over a touch of food poisoning upon arrival in La Paz, having a machete waved in my face and seeing a man dead in the road with traffic beeping at him for the inconvenience; I went out one night to a great steakhouse with ten other travellers from Germany, Finland, Oz, the US, Denmark, Korea and of course the UK.
We were a variety of ages as well as countries but the two Danish were energetic 20 year olds with enthusiasm for everything.
Our food took almost two hours to arrive so there was plenty of time for drinking and conversation. The best conversation went like this:
Danish guy: If I had boobs, I would see a sad person and I’d go up to them and I’d show them my boobs and then they’d be happy.
Aussie girl: But we don’t want to show our boobs to just anyone.
Danish guy: Yeah but you girls are so lucky because you have the ability to make almost everyone in the world happy if you would just show your boobs more often.
Me: So would you wear a top or just walk around all day with your boobs out?
Danish guy: No, I’d wear a top and then I’d go to an old people’s home and just put my boobs in the old men’s faces….oh no….they’d probably have a heart attack and die. But everyone is happier when they see boobs. If everyone saw boobs in the morning on their way to work they would be happy for the rest of the day.
Our end of the table that was engaged in this conversation was laughing so much at this. The tall, blonde Danish boy was meaning every word he said and he kept motioning lifting up his shirt and exposing himself. He really does believe the world could be a better place if only us women would make the effort.
We had a German guy with us who I would guess is mid-30’s. Thinking he might have a slightly more mature and practical outlook on this, the females of the group wanted to know his perspective.
The German enthusiastically beamed his broad smile: Ja, it’s such a good idea. Boobs make ve vorld a much better place.
His strong German accent and eager reply was enough to have us in stitches for the rest of the night.
* * *
So that was the boobie conversation. The second lot of female mammary glands in our topic today is Lake Titicaca, which raises a snigger from anyone with an immature sense of humour. An immature sense of humour really is the only one to have, whoever heard of a mature sense of humour? If saying Lake Titicaca to an English speaker leaves them stoney faced, then the person probably considers themselves too high brow to emit a laugh, what a Dullsville with a capital D that person must be.
A single outlet flows out of the lake south through Bolivia into Lake Poopó. Seriously, I’m not making this up. It’s as if they were named by ten year old boys.
The indigenous people of this part of the Andes are the Aymara people. They are short, stocky and the women mostly wear traditional dress. They wear between eight and ten skirts to make their hips look big to show they will be good for childbearing. Dress wise they are perhaps most famous for the bowler hats they wear perched atop their heads. The Aymara women have been wearing the hats since the 1920’s when a shipment of bowler hats for British railway workers arrived and were found to be too small (or the wrong colour, depending on who is telling the story) for the Brit’s heads so they told the locals they were the latest fashion in Europe and the rest is history.
A bowler hat perched directly on top of the head means the women is married/taken. If it’s perched to the side it means she single and ready to mingle. I can’t help wondering if we oughtn’t to perhaps adopt a similar system in all countries, it would make things a whole lot clearer. I think I could rock the bowler hat look.
The locals don’t like to have their picture taken so I haven’t taken any without their permission (it doesn’t stop many rude, Western tourists from getting out their Canons and grabbing a shot to share on Facebook or Instagram without asking the individual first). To see a good photo go to Google images and type in ‘Aymara women’ and you’ll see some great photos, hopefully taken with the lady’s permission.
We end today with a beautiful shot of Lake Titicaca, home of bowler hatted ladies…